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In an effort to ease the pain of Minnesota Timberwolves fans, Mystery Theatre 3000 writers have agreed to interpret President David KahnÆs most recent open letter.á á Dear Timberwolves Fans and Supporters: Dear people who donÆt turn off the television when we play and everyone else. á I am writing this to you while on the plane from Minneapolis to Memphis, on Friday night following our loss to Dallas. We are 1-9, having lost nine in a row. Our record was to be expectedùbut it will not be accepted.

Big difference, I think. á We knew that we would be bad but man we are stinking up the joint.á Did you see the Golden State game?á OK, if we are going to lose we can keep the margin of victory under 20.á Yes, it ...

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Article written by Kevin Lindsey